A few days ago we saw a report from "60 Minutes", broadcast on Israeli Channel 1's "Roim Olam", about a 14 year old autistic teenager named Tito, who despite the fact that he cannot talk well, he can communicate beautifully through writing. His mother devoted her life to him and made him capable of amazing things. He writes about what it's like to be autistic. After we saw the report we downloaded some of his writings from the Cure Autism Now Foundation and my father read it aloud to us while we sat in the living room. It was like poetry - Shakesperean poetry. His writing abilities are much better than the average person, and he writes about the feelings and thoughts he had - a window into the world of autistic people. He wrote a book and my sister ordered it.

This can help us understand my nephew and understand how to teach him things that autistic children can't do easily. Seeing Tito on TV and reading his writings makes me feel very positive about my nephew's future. I think he'll be even better than Tito, because he speaks fluently. His autistic ticks are much less frequent than they used to be, and from what I saw on TV, his hand ticks are much more subtle than Tito's. I don't think he'll be cured from autism - he'll always be autistic, but he'll be able to function on his own and be happy, and that's what is important.

I got my last grade for the year today - a 91 on the "Law and ethics in the media" course. So far, I have an 86.1 average, which is excellent. Even an 86.7 average just in the political science courses.

One week and two days left till my trip to Italy. How exciting!

I saw Naomi yesterday. She looked sad, but seemed better than when we spoke on the phone. Now I know that her father is the person who is sick (I don't understand why it took her so long to tell me that), he's in a coma, and the odds are against him. She was happy to see me.

Before my trip to the US we decided that, since our birthdays are one week apart, she'll buy me a present here, and I'll buy her a present in the States, which will be both a birthday gift and a memento from the States. I got her a teddy bear with "I love NY" on it. I gave it to her yesterday, along with a self-produced postcard (a picture of me in the States, which was taken with a digital camera and printed, and I left white space next to it and wrote that this was instead of a real postcard). She really liked both the teddy bear and the postcard.

I also told her about the fact that I'm going to Italy with my sister and our American friend. She didn't seem to mind. When she heard the friend was getting a divorce she got a bit scared and said that she hopes her husband isn't a madman who will think there's something going on between us and will kill me or something. It was actually amusing the way she worried.

I got a call from Naomi today. Now I know a lot more. She still didn't tell me what relative this is, she just said it was a close relative, from the nuclear family. She said she doesn't want to tell me who it is exactly, because it's too hard. This person had a simple operation half a year ago, and got an infection as a result. The doctors did not notice this and even when it was discovered, they underestimated the danger. Now he/she is unconcious and it seems that it is near the end.

She doesn't want me to tell any of our friends. So I'm writing this only here, where nobody can identify who I am or who she is.

I didn't tell her about going to Italy with my sister and American friend. It didn't seem appropriate.

It's pretty much official. I haven't heard anything from Naomi, and not for lack of trying. I assume our trip is off. I was a bit upset that I wasn't going to Italy, but then my sister offered that I come with her and our American friend (the one I went to the movies with) to Europe. We finally decided on a location after changing plans and cities a million times. We're going to Milane. So it turns out I'm going to Italy anyway.

Two terrible terrorist attacks today in the middle east, about 20 dead in each - the UN headquarters in Baghdad and a bus in Jerusalem. I don't know what the Israeli government is going to do. The Hudna is a sham. A cease-fire without the Palestinian authority fighting terror is nothing more than a temporary break in the fighting, not more. My first reaction after something like this is always to think the army should go in and blast the terrorists to hell, but it isn't that easy. I think we should respond, but in some kind of measured way.

Naomi sent me an SMS saying the situation is very bad and that she'll call me when she can. I hope she'll tell me more soon. I'm totally in the dark here.

I returned from the States last week. I had a great time. I must admit I'm sorry to be back. This year I had 5 birthday parties - one at home with my sisters before I left and then when I was at my relatives' house in New England they invited a different set of people each day and surprised me every day with a birthday cake - one day before, on, and one day after my birthday. Then about a week later, other friends of ours heard that it had just been my birthday so they also got me a birthday cake.

We did some site-seeing but we mostly saw friends and family. I attended my cousin's wedding - American weddings are very different from Israeli weddings, since we don't have the best man, bridesmaids and flower girl and all that. And we're much less official. It was my first time wearing a tie since kindergarten. I had a great time, danced a lot with two second cousins that I never met before. The two of them and one of their boyfriends might come to Israel sometime soon with the Birthright program, to tour, so I'll be their guide for my area.

My self-esteem and self-confidence rose during this trip. Everybody seemed to like me and be impressed by me. As a result, I came to the conclusion that I'm not interested in Naomi. I shouldn't chase around someone who isn't interested in me, and I'm not even sure we're a good match. I'm sure I can find a girl, which in a relationship with her we'll both feel lucky to be together. That doesn't mean I don't want to go to Italy with Naomi. We'll go, but just as friends, and neither of us will want any more than that.

In my trip in the US I went to a movie with a friend of mine. She's five years older, a mother of a 2-year old and now getting a divorce. We went just as friends, but I was attracted to her like crazy. She's smart, she's beautiful (looks much better than Naomi) and most important, she's a nice person. But she didn't know I'm attracted to her, and I didn't try anything. I'm too young to get involved with a woman who has a kid, besides the fact that she lives in the US and I live in Israel. Our families have been friends for decades, and we spent a few days with them. So I talked to her a lot, just because it was nice talking to her, and played with her kid a lot, just because I like playing with kids and he's a cute baby. She later e-mailed my sister writing I'm a great person. I'm happy to hear that she thinks so, though it doesn't mean she's interested in me. I'm not interested in her, either, just attracted to her.

And back to Naomi again - yes, I've come to the conclusion I'm not interested in her, but I'm still concerned about her. Yesterday she finally gave me a little tidbit about her problem - she said she spends most of her days at the hospital because of one of her relatives. She didn't say any more - not which relative, and not what diseas. Yesterday evening I called her and she couldn't talk, today I sent her an SMS message and called her once, and she didn't answer. I'm worried that something might have happened to the relative.